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Inside Scoop: Ring Bearer and Flower Girl Duties

So how did you choose your ring bearers and flower girls?

Did you stage ring bearer auditions, seeing which four- to eight-year old boy could best balance rings on a pillow? Did you make all your friends’ daughters try out to see which one could throw flower petals the furthest?

Admit it, you carefully selected these little helpers for your big day because of how cute they are!

Thankfully, any little human you dress in a cute outfit will look adorable toddling down the aisle. But your ring bearers and flower girls have more responsibilities than making your guests go, “Awww!” Just like the mother of the bride or the best man, these little helpers have specific duties before, during, and after the wedding ceremony!

Before the ceremony

Even before the big day, the ring bearers and flower girls must prepare to fulfill their duties. They must find their perfect outfit! The process will be much less time-consuming for these cuties than for the bride, groom, and bridal party. But they still must be sure to stay within the preferred guidelines of the bride and groom, get the right fit, and be ready to go for the big day! For some ideas for the boys, check out our article Dapper Ring-Bearer Outfits that Give the Groom a Run for His Money.

Also, because of their honored role in the wedding ceremony, ring bearers and flower girls must attend the rehearsal. They must learn where to stand, when to begin walking down the aisle, what to do while walking down the aisle, and where to go once they reach the end.

During the ceremony

The ceremony is the time for your little helpers to shine. Even after lots of practice, the walk these little guys take down the aisle is bound to be less than perfect. Expect the unexpected! Any mishaps make the event all the more cute and comical. The ring bearers traditionally walk down the aisle before the flower girls. As his name suggests, a ring bearer carries a pillow with two rings tied to it. Those rings are usually fakes but serve as representations of the bride and groom’s wedding bands.

The flower girls make their trek down the aisle after the ring bearers and before the bride. They typically carry a basket of some sort which contains flower petals. As they walk (or crawl or run or cry) down the aisle, these little girls are tasked with spreading the petals on the aisle to prepare the way for the bride.

If the little tykes that fill these roles at your ceremony are mature enough, they can stand along with the other members of the bridal party. Or, you can allow them to sit with their parents after they make it down the aisle.

After the ceremony

It would be easy to assume that once your tiny tots make it through the ceremony, their job is complete. This is not so! In order to remember the cuteness that were your ring bearers and flower girls for generations to come, you need to capture the day with pictures. Try not to test the patience of these little ones (and their parents) and take your pictures with them before any others. The big kids — like the bridal party and family members — can wait! Do some posed shots, some funny ones, some candids, and embrace any disfunction that follows! These pictures will be a gem for you, and for your helpers when they grow up.

After the pictures have been taken, the duties of the ring bearers and flower girls are officially fulfilled! Particularly even-tempered tots may entertain your guests on the dance floor. But otherwise, they are free to go and get a good rest after all their hard work.

Even if you are not interested in the traditional ring bearers and flower girls, you can still incorporate cuteness into your big day! Check out our articles about alternatives for some inspiration:

Get the “Aw!” Your Guests Desire with These Flower Girl Alternatives

Here Come the Rings: 8 Alternatives for the Ring Bearer

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