First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage. The concept of having kids after marriage is as old as the popular nursery rhyme. However like many things, times are changing. One of the most common questions couples these days have been asking themselves is should I have a baby? Today, we are going to go over everything you need to know about having a child and whether or not it is right for you. Read on to see what some people are asking themselves when they find themselves faced with the question; should I have a baby?
Figure Out What Your Reason For Wanting A Baby Is
Unfortunately, a common theme in today’s day and age is having a child as an accessory. If you find yourself asking the question, should I have a baby?, then you will want to consider your reasons why. Popular TV shows like MTV’s Pretty Mama’s and 16 And Pregnant have sensationalized having a baby at a young age. While this makes for good TV, the reality is not the same. Before you have a child, make sure that your reasonings for wanting to have the baby are not selfish or materialistic. This is the first step in considering whether or not you should bring a child into the world.
Have A Conversation With Your Partner
The next thing you should consider when you find yourself asking should I have a baby is how your spouse feels about it. Be sure to have a long and in-depth conversation with your spouse or partner about children. Often times this is a conversation that is held off until both parties are deeply invested in a relationship. Make sure to bring this topic up early on in your relationship so that you and your partner not caught off guard. When you do you have a conversation, make sure you and your partner are on the same page. Ask about each others your perspective on kids and how each of you feels about them. Not only that, but get into specifics such as how many kids each of you want. Be sure to stay connected and have the conversation before, during, and after you bring a child in the world.
Will You Have A Support System?
The next important thing you need to consider when you are deciding whether not to have a child is if you have a support system around you. Having a strong support system is imperative when you want to raise a child. When you have a strong support system, this means that you will have additional help when you are raising your child. you may not realize it now, but raising a child is incredibly difficult. You will want to make sure you have a strong support system behind you to help you when the going gets tough.
Are You Financially Stable?
The next important thing you need to consider when you find yourself asking should I have a child is in regards to what your financial standing looks like. Babies are expensive and they only get more expensive as they grow. In order to be prepared to raise a child, you need to make sure you have a steady stream of income. Consider your financial standing. Is it strong enough to support an additional human being? Consider things such as your living situation, food, medical bills, and other expenses that you will incur when you bring a child into the world. While you do not need to be rich to have a child, you do need to have financial stability to be able to support one.
Have A Plan
If you are a newlywed, one of the most important things you need to do to secure a happy relationship is to come up with a plan. You don’t go into marriage without a plan. The same goes for parenthood. A major part of your plan once you get married should revolve around children. With your spouse, consider what your plan for having children is. Be sure to clearly express the opinions you and your spouse have about children. Talking about it will allow you to come up with a plan you and your spouse can work towards. Once you have your plan in place or at least have begun talking about it, you will find yourself in a more secure place for bringing a child into the world.
Are You Ready To Give Up Your Free Time?
Children are incredibly time consuming. And it only gets worse as they grow. As your baby buds into an infant and then a teenager, you will only need to commit more and more time to them. The question is, is this something that you are ready for? This is something that you should consider seriously if you find yourself asking should I have a baby? One of the biggest things that you will lose once you become a parent is personal time for yourself. Consider the following questions.
- Are you ready to give up your personal time?
- How about giving up nights of restful sleep for a while?
- How about going out with friends?
- Are you ready to put nights out with your bestie on hold for a couple years?
Although many of these questions seem selfish, the reality is that a baby is incredibly time consuming. You can say goodbye to any personal time you have left once you have a child. You will be lucky if you have a moment or two to yourself, but anytime you do have for yourself, you will likely want to give it up for your child. Consider this carefully if you plan on bringing a baby into the world.
Are You In The Right Place In Your Career?
For many moms all over America, juggling motherhood and work can be very difficult. In fact, more and more expectant moms are choosing to be stay at home moms because of this. The downside is, many many moms do tend to put their career on hold so that they can raise their children. If you find yourself wondering should I have a child, the you need to consider this. Where are you in your career? Are you in a place where you will be able to walk away for a bit and raise your children? Is this even something you want to do? If not, how will you deal with childcare once you go back to work? These are all things you should consider seriously if you find yourself asking should I have a child.
Talk It Out With A Friend Or Loved One
Anyone can be a mom or dad, but it takes an extreme amount of effort and energy to be a parent. The best way to decide if being a parent is a path in your life is by doing the research first. If you are the last in your group of friends to be a mom, then get together with you mom friends and see their perspective on parenthood. Read up on the latest parenting articles to get a glimpse of what the mom and dad looks life. For some actual hands on experience, consider being around a family member with young children to get a first hand glimpse of what being a parent means. Lastly, don’t be shy to ask friends that are parents advice on what they think about you and your decision to be a parent is. The best advice comes from those who know us the most, so when it comes to this topic, nothing is really off limits.
Parenthood comes with its fair share of struggles, but the end result is always the same. Being a parent is one of the most honoring, and magical roles and individual can have. Before you do take the leap though, consider these questions and concerns when your find yourself asking should I have a baby.