Can you believe that your little girl is getting married?
Time flies! And now the big day is coming up soon, when your daughter will walk down the aisle and commit her life to the man of her dreams. All you can do is release your daughter out into the married world, enjoy the special day, and hope that their choices will take them far in their marriage.
As much as you might think that the mother of the bride is not too big of a role, it is an important role nonetheless. There are some mother of the bride duties that many women forget, and brides forget for that matter. But do not put down your role as a mother and as a friend, because there are many things you can do to help your daughter prepare for her big day. So keep some of these suggestions in mind when you enter into the world of wedding planning with your daughter.
1. Announce their engagement.
Contact your local newspaper and send them a picture and a short blurb about your daughter and her fiance for them to announce in the newspaper. Although it may not show up in the paper for awhile, it is still special to find it weeks or months later and have a nice reminder!
2. Guest list.
Sit down with either just the bride or the bride and the groom, and help them work through their guest list. Give them all the addresses, phone numbers, and email addresses you can of family members and close family friends.
3. The seating chart.
Because you have been married before (and if not, it is still great to help out), it is nice to have someone help her figure out the seating chart. Work through all of the guests and all of the RSVP’s to help figure out who should sit next to each other. If the bride decides to have open seating, then help her figure out how many tables she should order, chairs that need to be rented, etc.
4. Help plan the bridal shower.
Although this is mainly the job of the maid of honor, do not let her work through it alone! Help her figure out the perfect time to surprise the bride (if it is a surprise), work through the ladies on the guest list together, figure out snacks, food, and drinks, and simply aide in any other planning that goes along with the bridal shower.
5. Go wedding dress shopping with your daughter.
Wedding dress shopping is a special time for the bride-to-be, and it is also an intimate time for the mother and daughter. I guarantee that you will probably cry (unless you have tear ducts of steel), so it is a good idea to bring some tissues along on the ride! Although there is most likely a dress consultant helping out in the process, fluff up her train when she is looking in the mirror or straighten her veil when she puts the finishing touches on the dress she is wearing. Little gestures like this will not only please your daughter and make her feel loved, but it will benefit the mother and daughter bonding time you have.
6. Collect the RSVP’s.
Aide your stressed daughter in collecting the RSVP’s in the mail or online if they are doing that instead. Keep track of the yes’s and the no’s, along with the meal cards to help keep everything more organized and neat.
7. Find a mother of the bride dress.
You get your own dress! Holla! In order to color coordinate and please the future mother in law of the bride, either go shopping together or pick your colors ahead of time so you can match perfectly. It is also smart to consult with the bride as well (duh!), to make sure she loves the colors and approves of the dress you want.
8. Help her into her dress on the big day.
When you have finally reached the morning of the wedding, help your daughter into her beautiful gown. Offer to tie it in the back, zipper it up, or button up the buttons. Adjust the veil so it sits perfectly on her head. Smile for pictures, help her into her shoes. Pray for her or add your favorite set of pearls around her neck. No matter what it may be, be sure to help her and bond over these sweet wedding memories on the morning of the wedding.
9. Be her mother.
In the end, the biggest duty you have, is to be her mother. If she is stressed out and upset, hug her and remind her of the excitement that is coming up in her life. If she is laughing and happy, congratulate her and smile with her. If she just wants to hug you a little longer, hold on to those hugs. The biggest thing and most important concept is to love your daughter unconditionally and show her your never ending support.